Self-reflexive practice is the process and way of being in the form of a critically informed stance of reflexive dialogue with the self, regarding conscious and unconscious realities. This study explores how self-reflexive practice is taught to students in a PhD consulting psychology program and to offer a conceptual model to reflexive practitioners. The authors reflect on their experiences as lecturers who facilitate self-reflexive (identity work) with students in becoming reflexive and relational consulting psychologists. An extensive body of research exists concerning reflexive practice models and frameworks. However, less explored is a qualitative conceptual analysis, which demonstrates how self-reflexive practice is taught and facilitated. A qualitative, ethnographic approach was used. The authors reflected on the content of the PhD consulting psychology program and how the reflexive practice component of the programme is taught to students. The most appropriate written vignettes were used for thematic analysis and to develop the conceptual model. The programme positions the "self as primary instrument" of consulting; students are enrolled to step into reflexive spaces to hone their reflexive competence. They are guided, in the form of a reflexive theoretical lens, reflexive-oriented methodologies and, written reflections are offered by the lecturing staff on the students' reflective essays. The primary role identities of lecturers are expressed by adopting a reflexive facilitative stance, creating a safe space through holding and containment and effective boundary management. The outcome of this analysis is an ethnographically grounded conceptual model of how reflexive practice is taught. The study has implications for teaching reflexive practice in different disciplinary contexts as well as for consulting, coaching and research. The study's contribution lies in how it positions and embeds reflexive competence as a critical consulting, coaching and research skill. New methodologies and a conceptual model are offered to teach reflexive practice.