In 1991, Dana Jack introduced the Silencing the Self theory, which conceptualised self-silencing as the tendency for individuals to inhibit self-expression and prioritise others' needs to preserve harmony, primarily in the context of romantic relationships. Since then, extensive research has documented its negative consequences for individual and relational well-being, and adapted it to various contexts outside romantic relationships. However, questions remain regarding the role of gender and sociocultural values that shape self-silencing in everyday life. Further, the theory has largely been studied in Western settings, with limited exploration of how self-silencing unfolds in collectivistic societies, such as India, where relational expectations are deeply embedded in cultural hierarchies.
This study takes a culturally grounded approach to qualitatively examine how young Indian adults experience and negotiate self-silencing within close relationships. Semi-structured interviews were conducted with eight participants, and data were analysed using interpretative phenomenological analysis. Four overarching themes emerged: (1) Deciding to self-silence: contextual and cognitive considerations, (2) Cultural pillars of hierarchy and obedience, (3) Learning silence from the environment, and (4) Rupture and reappraisal: finding healthier ways to adapt. Findings suggest that self-silencing is not merely a passive process but an active negotiation shaped by relational dynamics, cultural norms, and individual agency. Participants learned to reappraise their self-silencing patterns over time, supported by internal changes and external influences, and cultivating more adaptive ways of self-expression.
By situating self-silencing within the Indian cultural context, this research demonstrates how gendered hierarchies, familial dynamics, and cultural values shape the interplay between personal agency and socio-cultural expectations. It also highlights the role of intersecting social identities including gender, class, and caste, among others, in this process. In doing so, this research extends and broadens self-silencing theory beyond its Western roots, offering new directions in understanding relational processes, cultural dynamics, and pathways to well-being.